Liking Authority and the Science of Persuasion

November 20th, 2015 Posted in Authority, Books, Likes UP, The Liking Authority | No Comments »

Likes UP! Like is such a popular word and has become the symbol of social approval and acceptance with the hand and thumb pointing up as in the Likes UP logo. This is the “find agreeable, enjoyable, or satisfactory” verb form of the word like.

“I like you.” Joe Girard is famous for using the statement, I like you, in his sales campaigns. And, “I like you,” was VERY effective.

Like has other definitions. Liking has been made famous by Robert Cialdini and it is his 5th principle of persuasion.

Liking. We like people who are similar, who give us compliments and who co-operate with us.


Match Liking with Authority and things shift higher –with a sharp increase or spike in activity.

Authority. We are more likely to comply with a request if it is coming from a perceived authority/expert. This is Cialdini’s 3rd principle of persuasion.

Authority by itself may trigger the negative reaction to reject of authority if it is perceived as someone giving orders or enforce obedience, but when it includes liking there is an attraction.


Author and authority are clearly the same root word. An author is broadly defined as "the person who originated or gave existence to anything" and whose authorship determines responsibility for what was created. Narrowly defined, an author is the originator of any written work and can also be described as a writer.

Typically, when someone calls themselves and author, they are referring to a book they have written. For example, as the author of the book, The Webinar Way, I invite people to go to Amazon where they can get a copy of the book and see all the reviews that show liking and consensus. The book illustrates that I speak as an authority on the subject of webinars.

As an authority you have the power to influence others, ideally in a positive way because of your commanding manner or recognized knowledge. There is a certain confidence with comes with authority. As a person with extensive or specialized knowledge about a subject you are an expert authority. Most important as an authority, you are a trusted, reliable source.

The original of the word author is from Middle English: from Old French autorite, from Latin auctoritas, from auctor ‘originator, promoter.’ So as an author or authority, you are promoting your expertise.

Here’s a quick refresher on the 6 Principles of Persuasion:

1. Reciprocity. We are obliged to give if we have been given something.

2. Scarcity. If it’s scarce, we want it more. Use this by highlighting the Benefits, Uniqueness and Possible Loss.

3. Authority. We are more likely to comply with a request if it is coming from a perceived authority/expert.

4. Consistency. We want to be consistent with our past commitments, even if the initial commitment is much smaller.

5. Liking. We like people who are similar, who give us compliments and who co-operate with us.

6. Consensus. If others (especially similar others) are doing it, then we are more likely to do it ourselves.


The Real Currency: Relationship Riches

October 26th, 2015 Posted in Relationship Riches | No Comments »

Relationships are powerful. From international relations to human social, interpersonal, intimate relations, relationships are the experience we have with each other here on planet earth.

In diplomacy, the term special relationship defines exceptionally strong ties between nations and used notably by Winston Churchill in 1946 to describe relations between the English-speaking people. An example of such a special relationship is the United Kingdom and the United States.

You cannot separate relationships and conversations. How we collaborate and get along with each other is a factor on an international scale and a personal basis. Communication takes many forms.

Sometimes the best conversations have no words. Body language can speak volumes. A nod, a wink can be all the gesture you need to get your point across.

Conversations, whether online, text, or in person, are the basis of relationship building. The real currency is Relationship Riches. Just look at all the social conversations on Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn. Whether you’re signing on new customers or holding meetings with a group of clients on a webinar, the quality of conversations that you engage can be a defining factor in your success.

Most commerce revolves around relationships whether business to business or business to consumer. Mathematical and database models also use the term relationship. Even automated businesses start with people planning the strategy and implementing the tactics. In business, and particularly if you are a coach or a consultant providing a service, you can use conversations to create trust and strong connections to build relationships.

Unfortunately, if you have bad habits in your personal relationships, then your conversation style spills over into business, and you may fall into patterns such as “talking over” each other, not listening or needing to being right or wanting the last word. When this happens, the conversation then triggers fear and judgment to takes over. The neuroscience does not matter (but it is interesting to discover hardwired circuits in all human brain functions).

Daniel Goleman defined relationship management as the combination of your self-management and your social awareness to understand emotions in strengthening relationships with others.

Improving relationships begins with communication.

How you talk to your spouse, partner, children, and neighbors is the core of your conversation style.

Close relationships is one area of life where using positive psychology can make a big difference. According to Shelly Gable, associate professor of psychology at the University of California-Santa Barbara, an important key to understanding a relationship’s strength is how it works in good times, not just whether it withstands the bad. Partners’ reactions to each other’s good news can better predict the quality of a relationship (and whether it will endure) than can a partners’ reactions to bad news.

The 3 wrong ways and 1 right way: Gable has found that out of four possible ways to respond to a partner’s positive news, only one the "active-constructive response" is good. Couples whose partners react in any of three less positive ways are at greater risk of separating.

Consider the following example Gable gives to illustrate: Your significant other comes home, beaming, and announces that he/she just got a great promotion at work. You could react with:

1. Active-constructive response. "That’s great, you’ve earned it, I’m so proud of you!" followed by questions. Conveys enthusiasm, support, and interest.

2. Passive-constructive response. "Great job, honey!" then shifting to the next topic. Like dinner.

3. Active-destructive response (what Gable dubs "finding the cloud in a silver lining response"). "Wow! Does this mean you’ll be working later hours? Are they going to be paying you more? I can’t believe they picked you out of all the candidates." Generally deflating.

4. Passive-destructive response. Can take either of two forms: "Wow! Wait until I tell you what happened to me today," which is very self-focused, or, "What’s for dinner?"—Ignoring the event altogether.

Positive reactions also magnify the uplifting effects of the good news for the partner who’s doing the sharing, Gable notes. A negative or semi-positive response to a partner’s good news, however, can undercut all the benefits derived from disclosing in the first place, such as fostering trust, intimacy, and satisfaction with the relationship.

Moving into the business realm, because the of the impact of financial gain and career advancement, when you improve conversations you tap the power of communication so you can create even deeper, more impressive results with your clients, team and the whole organization.

You don’t need to be a business leader to take advantage of investing in Relationship Riches. However, it is true that you will find politicians business and spiritual leaders at the core of those who are driving change and achieving superior results by leveraging communication and building relationships. Communication and cooperation have close ties.

In negotiation, the relationship often involves posturing and jockeying for position. If there is a transaction involved (Quid pro quo: you give me this, I’ll give you that) that requires a contingency then, once the transaction is complete, the relationship may plateau and not grow.

In both our personal and business lives, if there is fear of conflict unless you are someone who does not mind confrontation and getting everything out on the table, then the ability to communicate with honesty and care, diminishes. Then there is a block and lack of movement and the relationship stagnates.

In personal relationships, couples in distress reach out to therapists and pastors to get help to re-establish a strong and healthy connection. Focus on connection minimizes the uncertainty of the ’friend or foe’ stance. When we reach out and connect and touch each other through physical touch or kind words; we activate bio-chemicals and the trust networks engage which has a positive impact on bonding.

To re-build the bond there must be intentional communication that is non-defensive and open starting with a conversation that puts your feelings into words. Eugene Gendlin said that when we find the right images, phrases, metaphors, and words to fit our emotions, there is a kind of “resolution” one feels on one’s body and an easing of tension. Next, ask open-ended questions. Do this by either asking targeted questions, “What is your best outcome scenario?” or making unambiguous statements, “Tell me the story of _____ !” Finally, express empathy also known as recognition or validation. This is shown by communicating that, given your partner’s perceptions, these thoughts, feelings, and needs are valid and make sense to you and that you understand the other person’s experience. (It does not mean that you necessarily agree with this person.) You may have an entirely different memory or interpretation of events. You have your own perceptions. Both of your perceptions are valid.

It starts with Stephen Covey’s fifth habit – Seek first to understand, then to be understood. The rule is that understanding must precede any advice. The first goal of the conversation is only to understand, not to problem-solve. The reason that understand must come first is because premature problem solving tends to shut people down and close up. You want openness. Problem-solving and advice should only begin when both parties feel totally understood.

In business relationships, when there is a standstill, a mediator or communication coach is brought in to facilitate conversations. The goal is to help resolve conflict and deadlocks, and mediation is a voluntary process to settle disputes with an impartial third-party. What may also be uncovered are the interaction dynamics between the parties. If you are paying attention to the patterns (and breaking and interrupting the patterns), you may find that it strikes a cord and provides valuable insight. Then you can apply this going forward in with your colleagues and other business relationships. Individuals, teams, and organizations can shift to conversations that fundamentally transform the future of the company. A positive side effect is that you can make decisions faster, with higher levels of wisdom and a greater ability to see the impact you have on others.

Back to currency: Monetary systems of currency are defined by governments, with each type has limited boundaries of acceptance and are classified depending on what guarantees the value. Some currencies are legal tender and others are simply traded for their economic value. Digital currency arose with the popularity of computers and the Internet.

The real currency is Relationship Riches recognizes conversations as the medium of exchange. Within the system of human conversation and interaction, the goal is keep your relationship circulating in a upward spiral as it grows. Organizations take on a system format and you’ll hear a CEO say, “We are like one big happy family.” John Bradshaw described the family as a system and the dynamics associated with the family system.

Way back we were cavemen hunting and trading meat and gathering and trading seeds. We passed the first stages of currency, where metals were used as symbols to represent value stored in the form of commodities. This is the transaction level.

As we have evolved we move up to the transformational level where you’ll find conversations that spark movements and organizations that want change the world for the better. Core values are part of the transformation conversation and they encourage new ideas and openness.

Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs published in 1943 in Psychological Review, "A Theory of Human Motivation," identified the highest motivation as self-actualization (defined as realizing personal potential, self-fulfillment, seeking personal growth and peak experiences). You must satisfy lower level basic needs before progressing on to be able to reach self-actualization and this is the transcending level where there is an awakening and giving component. There is a deep understanding that the culture and conversation within an organization impact not just profits and customer satisfaction, but how they are perceived as “doing good” in the world. The culture conversation is a mirror of the people and what they think about and how they act. The quality of relationship dialogue is what will take you and your organization to the transcend level.

Who is making deals in business? Those who have built relationships. Who do you have on speed dial? That’s Relationship Riches. And of course, those riches also mean more profits. Business is likely the ultimate lever for making a difference in the world.

Relationship Riches in business give people the ability to have conversations that create businesses from the ‘inside out’ for more impact, more meaning, and more happiness for everyone involved.


Perfect Combination of Competition, Cooperation, Creativity, & Compassion

October 15th, 2015 Posted in Cause | No Comments »

Don’t you love when the synchronicity of things gives you a sense of total awe when it all fits together?

Yesterday, Michael Drew asked if I would participate in the 7 Day Experiment with John Maxwell. So Day 1 is based on the fact that the quality of your life is influenced by your family more than anything else, so make it your intention to choose a family member and offer to do something he or she would like to do.

Yesterday, I was also asked to reach out and gather support for a special cause and this became my Day 1 intention.

For those of you who don’t know about the Children’s Hospital that is an incredible institution that treats young patients (often with terminal illness) regardless of a family’s ability to pay — it is totally free. And they help an often under-served population in the Bronx and greater New York area. Those who have volunteered directly with these kids promise that this cause could not be more worthy. Pharmapalooza exists to raise funds for the kids at the Children’s Hospital at Montefiore.


Here are 3 things you can do to help:

(1) — Follow and like us on social media. Spread the word, retweet, repost and get others involved! The more followers and likes, the better! It seems like a simple ask, but truly helps so much. The handles and links are below.


Instagram: @pharmapalooza



(2) — DONATE directly to the cause. You can do so here:
Literally every single dollar counts, and it is tax deductible.

(3) — NEW YORK ROCK CONCERT — Come to the show! If you are in NYC and want to rock out then it is at BB Kings in Times Square on Thursday, November 5th, 2015.

Get tickets here:
(and you can donate here, too)


Please pass this along to other friends and family!

Lots of gratitude and love,
Sherrie Rose

#LikesUP for Pharmapalooza8

7 Must Have Tools For Creating A Must-Attend Webinar

October 10th, 2015 Posted in Webinar | No Comments »

Webinars are loved by those who embrace them and feared by those who may be overwhelmed by speaking “in public” or the technical aspects.

We’ll dispel all your worries and show you how easy it is to get started with webinars. Delivered live, webinars are incredible. Sharing and teaching quality of content LIVE over the internet and around the glove to folks who are participants in the experience not passive attendees can really be something special and lucrative. Provide your best content, entertain and encourage engagement are you are well on your way.

Once you have a great recording of a high-converting webinar, you can used an automated or hybrid system to keep that webinar attracting audiences and closing more sales. If you’ve never thought about adding a webinar to your marketing mix, now is the time.

Webinars provide an amazing opportunity to connect with your audience. It is the ultimate way to add value and deliver top-quality content that your participants can relate to and take action to implement immediately in their lives, job, or business.

Why Not Video?

When it comes down to it, some people just record a video with the same content they could provide in a webinar. Some people record a “video sales letter” and pass it off as a webinar. The purpose of marketing is to add value to what you’re creating and offering to your customers. The question is, do you want a passive experience or an active experience? Webinars are live events and they are an active experience.

Along with the training content this information is not part of a discussion on a webinar. The depth, interaction, and even entertainment your participants will receive makes the webinar an individual experience.   Note: Your webinar can turn into a video once you record the live session.

Tools To Get Started With Webinars

Starting webinars can be a daunting task. With all the talk of funnels and conversion and traffic, and the scary technology you may not know what your actual first step should be. Here is a list detailing the tools you need to get started with webinars right away. There are links to the tools mentioned and of course you can use the search engine to find similar tools and country specific links. Most of the tools listed below are software as a service (SaaS). SaaS is a software distribution model in which applications are hosted by a vendor or service provider and made available to customers over a network, typically the Internet.

7 Must Have Tools For Creating A Must-Attend Webinar:

1. A Presentation Software Tool

The word “webinar” comes from “web” and “seminar”. The seminar is typically a training or demonstration. Some are live streamed which are more of “talking heads” unless you opt for studio quality streaming. We’ll talk about live streaming with the webinar platform.

The idea behind the presentation is to provide visuals to support the content.

Creating visual content such as graphs, charts, text, images, can be done with presentation tools such as paid software PowerPoint or Keynote. You can also use free software Google Slides or Open Office Impress to put it all together.

2. Stock Photo Images


A webinar is an audio and visual experience. People do not want to just read text on a slide. Include images that create a bond and emotional connection and that supports the content you are teaching on your webinar.

There are many sites offering suggestions for images. Here are two compilations from Entrepreneur and Hongkiat

14 Amazingly Free Stock Photo Websites

30+ Websites for Stock Photos and Royalty Free Images

3. A Webinar Platform

To run a live event, you’ll need a webinar platform allow your prospects to register, show up live, and have the full experience.

There many webinar platforms available from free to thousands of dollars per month. Many offer a free trial period to try them out. Definitely take the time to test each one before going live. To get started, we recommend Meeting Burner because of the ease of use, built in easy-to-customize registration pages, and paid webinar registration pages.

You can check out the following platforms:

• FreeMeetingBurner

• Google Hangouts

• WebinarJam (based on Google Hangouts)

• GoToWebinar

• Instant Teleseminar

To livestream, the most popular is Google Hangouts on air.  With the advent of video broadcasting such as Periscope your livestream me fall into “just another talking head” if you do not have visuals to go along with your training content.

4. Service to Capture Email Address

You can rely on the webinar platform to send confirmation, reminder and follow up email addresses. But how will you connect with these folks after the webinar?

You may already have an email auto-responder. You may already have a more sophisticated multi-use integrated service with email, campaigns, shopping cart. That’s great but if you don’t you need to capture email addresses.

There are free email services such as MailChimp that you can use to send email follow up messages and invite them to future webinars.

Your registration page can capture the email address. If you want to set up detailed webinar follow up and sales funnels, you can go to the experts at Insightful Automation. If you are ready to launch a webinar funnel, then Insightful Automation has the expertise to design one for you.

5. A Registration/Sign-Up Page

Once you’ve chosen a webinar platform, you will need a dedicated place where the traffic you send from social media, blog posts, and other forms of connection can land. This special web page called a landing page, sign up page, or registration page and can be part of the webinar platform. It can also be a custom web page or a part of a landing page service.

If you want custom pages contact the experts at Insightful Automation. They will help you launch a webinar funnel designed for you. Insightful Automation has implemented hundreds of sales funnels for clients ranging from incredibly complex to incredibly simple. They can discuss the best strategy to increase your conversion rates and optimize your landing pages. Most important is the user experience just as it is on live webinar. They can help you create a shopping cart checkout experience that is congruent with your current webinar. This ensures that the customer feels comfortable all the way through the buying process.

You can also use plugins for word press such as Optimize Press for your registration page. You can use SaaS software (online tool) such as LeadPages or the very popular Click Funnels for your webinar registration page and follow up thank you pages.

These dedicated registration pages have one single focus free of other distractions with the goal of getting the registration.

5. A Closing Action or Sales Page

You’ve all heard the phrase “take action” and that is exactly what we want the webinar participants to do – take an action.  And, that action should be a closing action that you determine in advance.

always be closing on your webinar

Always Be Closing scene Glengarry Glen Ross

Now the action, is a closing action and it comes at the close of the webinar. You share a link to a specific page which can be a sales page, a survey page, an application page, or any other closing action that fits the purpose of your webinar. Again you may use an online tool to create the page or create a custom web page.

It is always the POWER OF YOUR WEBINAR content and the value you provide (whether free or fee-based webinars) that will ultimately be the reason your participants take the action you request. You content will do the persuading and you can follow the famous Glengarry Glen Ross movie, and Always Be Closing. The CLOSE brings your participants closer to you, your offer and your desired outcome. Everybody benefits.

7. A Story that is Compelling

Start with a headline or sexy subject line:

7 Ways to Create a Seductive Webinar Title

Webinars can be used for lead generation, training, group content delivery, membership programs, awareness campaigns, and of course for sales. Webinars are extremely effective, but it starts with your story and webinar title. This is the copy around your pre-webinar emails, social posts, and registration page. This this story on the webinar itself. This is the continuation of the dialogue in the follow-up sequence after the webinar. If you are not great at copywriting, then hire a professional.

We really should have started with compelling copy but then you may have been confused that we are putting copy in the category of a tool. Even the most boring subject can be made interesting with the right approach and compelling words. Use your dictionary, thesaurus and a Descriptionary (thematic dictionary) to help you craft your message.

Remember people are giving you their most valuable asset, their time, when they show up and participate in your webinar. Make it exciting!


The Space In-Between

October 6th, 2015 Posted in Facebook, Liking Behavior, Recommendations | No Comments »


Look at a diagram that shows all possible logical relations between a finite collection of different sets and you’ll see a Venn Diagram.

The diagram shows the space in-between or shared area.  The example below shows the gray area in the diagram by Vishen Lakhiani runs Mind Valley in Kuala Lumpur.


If you’ve been involved in the debate about "Guns vs. No Guns" in the U.S… then read this Facebook post by Vishen. 

Over the weekend I dedicated my FB page to bring more awareness to gun violence in America. This is the key thing I learned from the 1200+ comments the posts generated.

First, I did this because I care deeply about the lives lost to mass shootings which occur on almost a daily basis in America. I’ve met a mom who lost her child at Sandy Hook. He was my son’s age. I can’t imagine the grief.

And I agree with the President’s statement that America as a nation cannot just let this be ‘routine’.

But here’s what I notice. America’s biggest problem is not gun violence. Or abortions. Or illegal immigrants. Rather it’s an inability to ‘listen’ to the opposite site and see the commonalities. Almost every major issue in the news is reported in stark black or white. Right or Left.

Yet often, the answer is found in the space in-between – within the shades of grey.

Anti-gun advocates scream for the removal of all guns so we’re all safer.

Pro-gun advocates scream that guns are needed for us to be safer.

Both are flawed arguments. Because no conclusive evidence exists for either.

But notice what we have in common. Both want all of us to be ‘safer.’

The media trains us to see things as Left or Right. And to see the other side through a lens of "Us vs Them" that is so strong that we forget that the other side are also rational, good human beings.

Just with a different news source.

I tried an experiment. I posted a stat on Gun violence and stated that "We should not take away guns as they are a big part of the American psyche".

Yet almost also the disagreeable comments I got missed this point and ranted about how owning guns was a constitutional right.

So how do you start solving the gun issue? Focus on the grey zone that both gun advocates and anti-gun advocates agree upon. And it has to do with making guns safer.

87% of gun OWNERS support criminal background or “Brady” checks for all gun purchases.

But by April 2013, when the Senate considered a bill to do just that, the N.R.A. helped defeat it. Today gun and ammo companies are protected by laws so absurd that they cannot be held accountable for poor safety or stronger background checks.

As a result guns fall into the wrong hands. Professor Webster argues that smarter gun policies could reduce murder rates by up to 50 percent – that’s 5000 American lives saved a year.

Yet few people focus on this singular issue because both sides are screaming at each other.

If America got its act together and focused on solving the simple issue of better background checks plus accountability for gun dealers and manufacturers, we can go a long way to saving lives. And the best part is that BOTH sides already agree on this.

The best ideas are rarely black or white. Instead you find them in the shades of in-between grey. And you learn to see the grey when you listen more and scream less and seek to find commonalities with the other side and not obsess on the differences.

© 2011 The Liking Authority. All Rights Reserved. Sherrie Rose® is a Registered Trademark.